Monday, September 9, 2013


Remember when I told you about a mass baptism I was witness to way back in 2011?  Well, recently I was visiting again with good friends, and we attended the same church again, and it happened to be baptism Sunday again.

Just like the first time, it was an incredibly inspiring thing to watch: filled with symbolism, a total body commitment to living as a Christ follower.  Tears were streaming down my cheeks as I cheered with these new sisters and brothers, and welcomed them into the family.

This time there was something a little different, though.  Those who were being baptized wore black shirts with white rectangles on the front.  In the white rectangle, each person wrote one word or a short phrase symbolizing what baptism means to them.  Lots of people wrote "forgiven" or "loved" or "blessed".  I saw a few "child of God," a "Victory!" and even a "Finally!" from an older man.  As each person appeared on the big screen for their dunk, I found myself straining to read those words.  I wanted to know what they were feeling in that moment.

I found myself thinking about what my word would be.

If you've been around for a while, you've probably noticed that I struggle with feeling like I'm not enough.  Not pretty enough, not outgoing enough, not motivated enough, not thin enough, not smart enough, not loving enough, not energetic enough, even, if you can believe it, not creative enough. 

I feel like, because I'm so not enough, I don't deserve good things--that I'm not worthy of esteem, not worthy of friendship, not worthy of admiration, not worthy of trust, not worthy of love.


But God.  Through baptism into the family of Christ, God has called me worthy.  Little old not-enough me.  And who am I to question the maker of all things?


What would your word or phrase be?

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