Thursday, December 30, 2021

My fantasy self does puzzles (and likes them)

You know how there are people in the world who set out a puzzle around Christmas time and the whole family will work on it from time to time as they pass by?  And the puzzle brings different groups together for brief moments of time and they chat while they work and they find pieces for each other?  And then the next time it's a slightly different group and they still talk and work and laugh and in general have a good time and enjoy each other's company?  And how those people get those puzzles done in a reasonable amount of time?  Like a week?  Or two days*?

I want to be one of those people, one of those families.  I have wanted that for a while now, at least 10 years, and this year, this Christmas, I actually obtained a puzzle and set it out for the family to work on.  

But my family is not being cooperative**.  And my puzzle fantasy is dead.  Dead, I tell you.

Here's how my puzzle looked on December 25.

And here's how it looks today, five days later.

OK, yeah, there has been some progress.  But y'all.  There is no family-members-stopping-to-put-in-a- puzzle-piece-as-they-pass by.  There is no forming-and-reforming-temporary-groups-to-work-on-the- puzzle-together.  There is definitely no getting-it-put-together-in-a-week.  It's pretty much just me.  Kind of hating it, except when I find a piece--then I temporarily love it and immediately go back to kind of hating it, until I find the next piece.

I'm not sure the pleasure of actually finding a match makes the angst of looking worthwhile***.

But will I stop?  Oh no.  Definitely not.  I will not stop working on the puzzle.  I will not stop looking for new puzzles to put together.  I will not stop thinking about which puzzle we should do as a family next Christmas.  I will not stop pretending that working puzzles is something I enjoy.  I will not let my fantasy puzzle self go.  

It's disappointing and annoying to be faced with such strong proof that something I believed to be true about myself is not.  Someday (probably within a year, but I'm not making any promises) I will finish this puzzle, and then I can go blissfully back to believing that I enjoy working puzzles.  

Until then, tell me: what does your fantasy self enjoy?

*OK, you're right--two days is definitely not reasonable for a 1000 piece puzzle.
**I should have been more strategic in choosing the family to work on my real life puzzle with my fantasy self.  Like I should have chosen the family that actually likes and is good at puzzles.  But they weren't available.
**This seems like a statement that could apply to a lot of situations, but it's that weird week between Christmas and New Year's Day, and I have no brain power to even keep track of what day it is, so I'm not gonna go any deeper on that.  But hey, feel free if you're in the mood.

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