I may have mentioned a time or two that I really, really, (really) dislike sweeping. Mostly because sweeping is a never-ending chore. I feel like I'm never able to actually get everything when I sweep. I do my best, but there's always some little something left behind, even, it seems, if I vacuum up my pile. And then you know what happens. The children.
Our floor is always dirty. Even if I just swept. Even if I just mopped. Still dirty.
It bothers me. I want to be able to sweep and mop and then look around and say, "there. That's done." And have it stay done, at least for a little while. I want to be able to take pride in a job well done.
It is so discouraging to me that so much of my work is so easily undone. I wonder, often, why I even bother. Why do I even bother to clean the bathroom, make my bed, sweep the floor, wash the windows? Oh wait, I don't wash the windows. But I do think about washing the windows, and I do intend to wash the windows at some point in the unspecified future. I even wrote it down once, so, you know, there's that.
It's hard to muster up enthusiasm for performing repetitive tasks without lasting effect. So it was with a less than cheerful attitude that I set out to uncrunchify our floors this afternoon. I wouldn't say I was grumpy or resentful, more like resigned to the inevitable and discouraged. I don't think the cold gray sky was helping any, either.
My dirty floor is discouraging, but it is also a blessing. That's what I kept telling myself as I was sweeping this afternoon, making wagers with myself about how long it'll be before I'm needing to sweep again (let's see--the first wave of kidlets will be home in about 20 minutes, so I predict ... about 21 minutes until new crumbs grace the floor). It is so hard to see a dirty floor as a blessing, but here goes.
I am blessed to have a floor. I am blessed to have a place to live that is warm and secure.
I am blessed to have food to nourish myself and my family. In fact, we are extravagantly blessed with so much food that some of us are unconcerned about letting crumbs of all sizes fall to the floor.
I am blessed to live where I do, surrounded by trees and dirt.
I am blessed to have children who are active and love to be outside and also love to track in dirt and pine needles.
I have a choice. I can choose to consider my challenges as a burden or a blessing. Today, truthfully, they are both. I'm working on it.